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Oh noes! Pit Bulls are BOILING over!


We've had visitors of Fruitland attacked by pit bulls, boiling over their fences


Somebody left the pit bulls on the stove for too long, and now they are just boiling over. They especially like to boil over fences, because that takes a lot of skill...we all know pit bulls like to be skillful. They can exert five billion pounds of pressure in order to crush the earth's mantle, they have jaws that can unhinge in order to eat an entire elephant, and their brains are so ginormous that not even a blue whale's head could fit one!

We've had visitors of Fruitland attacked by pit bulls, boiling over their fences, we've had other neighbors attacked, by carelesslly kept pit bulls we've had police officers attacked who went to assist residents being attacked by pit bulls we've had city parks become unsafe and unusable because of the threat of pit bulls,” said Schuller.

Not only that, but in Fruityville, they have a serious problem with pit bulls hijacking school buses, robbing convenience stores, pulling wheelbarrows while under the influence (of the devil, no doubt), and interfering with all sorts of daily activities (like peeing in the bathroom, making waffles for breakfast, trying to use more than half of the bed during the night...oh wait, that's all true - damn you Mina, DAMN YOU!)

It actually covers even more than pit bulls.  It also covers other animals that also fall into a "dangerous dog" category. 

Huh? Other animals? I guess in Fruitatemefordinnerville, there are "other animals" that could fall into a "dangerous dog" category. You may not have known this, but geese are actually dangerous dogs because they are other animals, and they have been known to attack unprovoked and with a fury only hell and a scornful woman might know. 

My head hurts.

http://www.ktvb.com/news/localnews/stories/ktvbn-jun1406-pitbulllaw.8758e3c6.html

 

 

Fruitland-- Effective tomorrow a new, tough dog ordinance goes into place in Fruitland.

It's the result of a brutal attack earlier this year on an Ontario man.

 

KTVB

A new, tough dog ordinance goes into effect tomorrow for Fruitland residents.

 

People who currently own pit bulls will be able to keep them, but at a hefty price.  Including licensing fees and insurance.  Leaders say it's all a part of keeping their town safe.

When Virgil Goodnight was attacked by three pit bulls earlier this year, it caught the attention of a lot of people, especially the Fruitland city council.

“Virgil survived because he's a big man, woman or a person of average stature would have been killed,” Fruitland City Councilman Keith Schuller said.

Leaders worked on a pit bull ordinance for a year, the attack made them act even quicker.

Starting tomorrow, people who own a pit bull will have pay for a 500 dollar annual license, purchase one million dollars of liability insurance, have rabies shots and have their animals spayed or neutered and in a secure enclosure.  Finally, any new residents who move to Fruitland won't even be allowed to own a pit bull.

I've got bit by one, so there's no way I would own a pit bull,” said Fruitland resident Lynn Sherer.

Some people who own dogs support the ordinance, but for some pit bull owners it will mean losing a family pet.

“A part of me understands, you know of course I'm upset because we have to adopt our dog out to somebody,” said pit bull owner Debbie Bartlett.

Debbie Bartlett was angry when she heard about the new ordinance.  She's owned her pit bull for 15 years, but says there's no way she can afford the license.

“You have to understand why Fruitland's doing this it's to avoid, it's for those people who are not responsible for those people who do not take into consideration the type of damage these dogs can do if raised in the wrong environment,” said Bartlett.

And it's exactly those kinds of owners that the city is clamping down on.

We've had visitors of Fruitland attacked by pit bulls, boiling over their fences, we've had other neighbors attacked, by carelesslly kept pit bulls we've had police officers attacked who went to

assist residents being attacked by pit bulls we've had city parks become unsafe and unusable because of the threat of pit bulls,” said Schuller.

This new ordinance is modeled after one in Denver.

It actually covers even more than pit bulls.  It also covers other animals that also fall into a "dangerous dog" category.


 

Comments

( 5 comments — Leave a comment )
(Deleted comment)
rinalia
Jun. 17th, 2006 03:47 am (UTC)
I know! And when I e-mailed them about it, I received a standardized response...which, oddly enough, made me chuckle even more.
dragonvyxn
Jun. 15th, 2006 01:37 pm (UTC)
i did not know that pit bulls were a liquid.
rinalia
Jun. 17th, 2006 03:47 am (UTC)
Now you do. And knowing is half the battle. ;)
(Deleted comment)
rinalia
Jun. 17th, 2006 03:48 am (UTC)
OMG! Didn't you know it's TOTALLY effective legislation to punish the law-abiding citizens?!? I feel safer already knowing that Fruitytutu is going to take care of all those liquid pit bulls boiling over fences! The world is a safer place.

Sounds like a very scary place in your complex! I'd be on the lookout for vicious tea kettles, rather than vicious dogs!
( 5 comments — Leave a comment )

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