rinalia (rinalia) wrote,

Souped up vacuum cleaners

I'm buying a vacuum cleaner, one of those bagless types. As I search high and low for the best vacuum cleaner ever, I have discovered the strange world of "Vacuum Cleaner Gadgetry". The names alone are worthy of attention: Eureka Whirlwind, Dirt Devil Vision Sensor, Bosch Cyclone, Bissell Lift-Off, etc. But it's those extra doo-dads, those thingamabobbers that caught my eye. (Figuratively, of course).

For example, the Bissell Powerforce Bagless Upright Vacuum Cleaner (say that five times fast) comes fully equipped with, get this, a headlight. I suppose there may come a time when all of my light bulbs blow out, and I am forced to vacuum in the dark. Having a headlight will come in  handy, then. This vacuum cleaner is also accessible for people of all heights - that is because it has five height adjustments. That is four more than I need, but perhaps I should develop a greediness for height adjustability in my vacuum cleaners.

The Fantom Vacuum series comes with DUAL-CYCLONIC TECHNOLOGY. I do not know what that is, but I feel it must be one of those things you say with a loud, deep, projecting voice. Perhaps I shall ask a sales representative at Target (where I do ALL my vacuum cleaner shopping), in an authoritative voice, "Do your vacuum cleaners utilize DUAL-CYCLONIC TECHNOLOGY?" and smile in triumph. Okay, apparently all bagless vacuum cleaners come with this technology, so I won't go around asking the sales associates at Target about that...

Almost all of these vacuums have "handy extension wands" for all those hard-to-reach magically inclined spots. Now, if your magically inclined spots are wreaking havoc five miles away, have no fear, just use the "telescopic extension wand". And when I'm in the mood to visit the moon or my roof, I shall utilize the "lift-off technology" some of these vacuum employ. 

Alright,  I'm off - wish me luck!
  • Post a new comment


    default userpic

    Your reply will be screened

    Your IP address will be recorded 

    When you submit the form an invisible reCAPTCHA check will be performed.
    You must follow the Privacy Policy and Google Terms of use.