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When you have a big decision to make, what sort of things do you do to help move that decision along?

I've crafted a pro/con list, visualized my ideal situation and discussed some of it with someone who has been in a similar situation. I have also picked my lip bloody, which is not actually a decision making method but apparently an obsessive-compulsive stress-related problem. More constructive methods appreciated.

Any other thoughts/suggestions?


( 6 comments — Leave a comment )
Nov. 19th, 2009 02:50 am (UTC)
so, i usually meditate on it and pretty much make up my mind... and then i usually talk to as many people as i can about it after that. heh. other people know lots of cool things, so it's important to talk about things.
Nov. 19th, 2009 06:36 am (UTC)
I go for a run, with or without K. A HARD, dripping-in-sweat run, until I'm worn out. Then I consider my choices again. Then I sleep on it. Then I decide.

I can't tell you if it'll work for you, but...well, I have practically zero things I regret in life.

The one thing I do regret, was the one time I listened to another person against my gut. That turned out bad. But see, my gut warned me - I just chose not to listen.

Anyway, don't underestimate yourself. If you're overly stressed about it even though the pros outweigh the cons, or friends are telling you to go for it, there may be a reason not to do it that you don't consciously see at the moment. :-/ Or vice versa, if everything points NOT to do it, but your gut says otherwise.

Of course, my method of trusting yourself only works as far as you know yourself. If that's true for you, have at it!

Nov. 19th, 2009 07:22 am (UTC)
I like to create Plans A-C (or further up the alphabet if necessary).

Making up my mind is, like, hard.

I second exercising while thinking. I wrote most of my undergrad thesis on the treadmill. George wrote my the bulk of my papers for grad school while we walked around my hood.

OR you could call me and babble for a while. I'll be driving through your fine city around 6pm tomorrow.
(Deleted comment)
Nov. 19th, 2009 12:07 pm (UTC)
Nov. 19th, 2009 12:06 pm (UTC)
First of all, I hope it's an OK decision and not an indication of anything wrong. *worries*

OK, to answer your question. What I do is try to get someone to give me values clarification, which is where they talk about the decision with you in a fairly normal way except that instead of trying to get an actual decision they encourage you to work out what the consequences of the decision are, and (this is the interesting bit) which consequences you actually care about and why. And you can then do the same thing separately with each consequence if you want (i.e. work out what the consequences of the consequences are, and which ones you actually care about and why). When I do this, I don't particularly try to do things in order or logically, I talk around things however we feel like, but with the topic being consequences and why you care about them.

What often happens is that you (that's the person with the decision, not the other person — it's sort of one of the rules that what they think mustn't matter) realise that the decision affects some particular thing that you particularly care about, and that helps you decide.

Let me know if I didn't explain that well.

OR ... I toss a coin. :-/

I'm emailing you my phone number, in case you want to call someone while Americans are asleep. You can see my time zone at http://www.timeanddate.com/worldclock/city.html?n=240.
Nov. 21st, 2009 12:47 am (UTC)
i like bounce ideas off everyone. but never feel beholden to anyone elses opinion as you are the one who gets to live with the decision. i also tend to play worst case scenarios in my mind because thats how i roll.
( 6 comments — Leave a comment )

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