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I can has a state of the union. You can too! If you want to watch streaming, you can here. I will be providing UP TO THE MINUTE commentary. Unless I get bored.

Damn you, SCOTUS, damn you!! Not all of you, just the ones who think corporate personhood is totally awesome-johnson. Which rhymes in my head, not yours.

Everybody likes Michelle Obama. Fact! Apparently even more than the President!

Yeah, Washington - why haven't you fixed all our problems? You've got a freaking space needle, right?

Obligatory standing ovation!

If you all hated the bank bailout, why did you do it? Can we renege? GIVE ME MY MONEY BACK!

Oh, I guess we recovered most of the money we spent on banks. Could have fooled me.

STANDING OVATION! I should clarify - standing ovation from el democratos. The republicans are trying very hard not to applaud.

It's true, they cut taxes. I received a tax cut in 2009. It was great.  Oh, Obama, you crazy man, thinking the Republicans would applaud you for cutting taxes!

It's all about jobs, jobs, jobs. STANDING OVATION FROM EVERYONE!

$30 billion from the banks to small businesses. REPUBLICANS ARE UNMOVED! Eliminate capital gains taxes. REPUBLICANS STILL UNMOVED!!

Holy crap, Florida's going to get a high speed train system before California? FAIL! REPUBLICANS HAVE TURNED INTO STONE!

Tax breaks to American companies! REPUBLICANS ARE ACTUALLY SPARKLEPIRES!

Damn you, China!! Damn you, Germany! NO SECOND PLACE FOR U.S.A.!

Get it right the first time, yo! REPUBLICANS HAVE TURNED INTO INANIMATE CORPSES WHICH IS GOOD BECAUSE CORPSES SHOULD NOT BE ANIMATED!

HOLY SHIT EVERYONE LOVES NUCLEAR POWER PLANTS! HOLY SHIT EVEN MORE, MORE OFFSHORE DRILLING!

Republicans do not like to be accused of not believing the OVERWHELMING scientific evidence pointing to climate change.

Obama: We need to export more of our goods. ME: EXPORT REPUBLICAN SENATORS AND REPRESENTATIVES!

Panama is one of our key partners?

Math and science are great, but for cripes sakes, the arts and "soft" sciences are super important too. Not all of us want to be nuclear physicists drilling oil offshore!

DEAR GOD, GIVE ME MY FREAKING HEALTH CARE! GIMME, GIMME, GIMME, GIMME!!!!!!! STANDING OVATION!

The President may be unable to get a standing ovation from the Republicans, but Michelle Obama tackling childhood obesity gets a standing ovation from EVERYONE, EVEN GOD/DESS!!!

The State of the Union address must be the one group aerobic exercise for Democrats. Up - standing ovation! Down - applause. Up - standing ovation. Down - applause. Rinse and repeat!

RELUCTANT REPUBLICAN OVATION!

No spending for three years? Are you for reals?

THE BUCK STOPS HERE. REPUBLICANS HAVE BEEN REVIVED, THEY'RE ALIVE, ALIIIIIIVVVEEEE!

We face a deficit of trust - Obama. FACT!

TAKE THAT, SCOTUS! OBAMA TOOK YOU DOWN. DOWN TO AUSTRALIA! AND BACK!

Yeah, Democrats! Stop running to the hills.

And Republicans, stop being self-serving assholes. YEAH.

MICHELLE OBAMA SUPPORTS MILITARY FAMILIES - STANDING OVATION FROM THE UNIVERSE!

REPUBLICANS OPPOSE GAY PEOPLE! Obama damn well better repeal the don't ask, don't tell policy. It's a dumb policy, that one.

REPUBLICANS OPPOSE EQUAL PAY FOR WOMEN! Well, shit Republicans, I still get paid 0.77 to every dollar a man gets paid for doing the SAME FREAKING JOB. Silly heads.

AND GOD BLESS LITTLE TIMMY TOO!

Comments

( 12 comments — Leave a comment )
rozae
Jan. 28th, 2010 05:41 am (UTC)
Are you high? Y/N?
polyphonicvegan
Jan. 28th, 2010 06:54 am (UTC)
HIGH ON LIFE and/or RAGE.
rozae
Jan. 28th, 2010 12:24 pm (UTC)
Hopefully not the latter!
rinalia
Jan. 28th, 2010 03:31 pm (UTC)
I wish! No, I was perfectly sober. Is that good or bad? :)
rozae
Jan. 28th, 2010 07:31 pm (UTC)
I'm not sure. Parts of your post I do not comprehend! I wonder if I timed your posting to the speechifying, if I'd get the confusing parts. XD
rinalia
Jan. 28th, 2010 10:01 pm (UTC)
Oh yeah, sorry - they were totally in response to things said at that exact moment. They probably make little sense if you weren't watching w/ me. :)
rozae
Jan. 28th, 2010 10:14 pm (UTC)
It's cool -- it was an amusing read! Kind of like watching men watch football. "OH WHAT THE--PICK UP THE BALL!!" Watching people watching sports should be the new spectator sport. :P
rinalia
Jan. 28th, 2010 11:11 pm (UTC)
Oh geez, I hear you! My neighbors LOVE football, and it's a show in itself listening to them watch the games. That's entertainment!
polyphonicvegan
Jan. 28th, 2010 06:53 am (UTC)
I HEART YOU!
rinalia
Jan. 28th, 2010 03:32 pm (UTC)
I HEART YOU TIMES TEN!
zita_skyandano
Jan. 28th, 2010 03:37 pm (UTC)
It'll be nice if he can actually deliver on half the things he said he was going to do. But especially health care. America needs universal/public health care like WOW.

Also, he better stop dragging his feet with don't ask don't tell. The reaction is going to be the same no matter when he does it, people will just have to learn to suck it up and deal with it.

I think my all time favorite part was the "the senate passed a bill blocking this so I'm just going to go ahead and use an executive order to make it happen anyway" XD

~Striker
yesididit
Jan. 28th, 2010 04:06 pm (UTC)
hehehe, this makes me wish i had done the same thing as you. i shouted a lot of things back at the tv. lots of what he said i'm all fingers crossed and wishing and hoping. and i noticed too how the democrats were all up and down and up and down, and the republicans were mostly looking not happy. i'm a bit confused on how there can be no spending for 3 years.

i'm also not entirely certain he's got it right about schools, only rewarding the ones that show progress? um, the schools that dont show student progress are probably the ones that need the help! i understand concern about squandering money, but taking away funds for inner city schools isnt going to help anyone. its kind of like dooming to poor to stay poor. i think more time and money should be focused on school education than college. its nice all his plans for making college more affordable, but our k-12 schooling system sucks eggs and lags behind so many other developed nations. i guess i just want my cake and to eat it too.

truthfully, if i had to choose, i'll gladly take health care reform first and foremost, no matter how many years it takes, and no matter what else has to sit on a side burner.

watching him speak is kind of amazing to me. he seems so relaxed about it, doesnt hardly stumble at all, stays on topic, speaks eloquently and inspirationally. theres just no way in hell i could ever pull off something like that. and he didnt lose me anywhere during his speech. didnt ramble on or go into topics that cause my brain to go numb while i stare at the wall. he's a very good public speaker.
( 12 comments — Leave a comment )

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